More specifically, what a Christian Man wants in a relationship. I will not pretend to “speak for all men”, I speak for me alone, but I do feel this WILL resonate with a lot of Christian Men, AND even Christian women.
What I USE TO Think was important, even necessary.
B.C. BEFORE CHRIST (CAME INTO MY HEART AND LIFE).
BEFORE I gave my heart to Jesus…the ONLY requirements for a woman were:
- Pretty face.
- Killer figure.
- Have a pulse.
- Like me.
AFTER BECOMING A CHRISTIAN: THE EARLY YEARS
I gave my heart and life to The Lord Jesus Christ when I was 17…so my list did change…some…at first.
- Be a Christian.
- Like/share some of the same hobbies/interests.
- Pretty face.
- Killer Figure.
- Like me.
It was not long though in my DAILY Christian walk that I saw and learned some things.
NOT everyone claiming to BE Christian IS one. A LOT of fakes, phonies, shallow, and wishy-washy folk who lay claim to being a Christian, but are either new/weak in their faith, or hypocrites.
And sharing the same hobbies and interests IS good- it only goes so far.
LOOKS? Though nice, are NOT enough. NOT even close. A lot of fine women in the church world who are Jezebels, Delilahs, and sexual predators, (yes, female sexual predators ARE real. They live to seduce, conquor, then dump as many foolish Christian men as they can…I was married to one. The world calls them “Cougars”, God calls them wicked).
And like, even what a lot of Christians call love, is very shallow, transient, fickle, and flesh based. “I love you”…later that day…they’re flirting with someone else. THIS is definitely NOT love. Affection? maybe. Attraction? possibly, and quite shallow at that. Lust? mostly, sadly, and briefly…til their next conquest arrives.
So, What am I looking for, my REQUIREMENTS now? Glad You asked…
- BE A REAL, BIBLICAL, FAITHFUL TO GOD, FAITHFUL TO CHURCH CHRISTIAN. MUST have a track record of faithful attendance to the House of God, Prayer, Worship. MUST Have. MUST BE.
- MUST be Baptised in The Holy Ghost and Fire, or ACTIVELY seeking and praying for it…MUST.
- MUST LOVE The Lord Jesus Christ SO MUCH that worship is natural, easy, and a joy.
- MUST have a DAILY devotional and prayer time; MUST hunger, thirst, and seek after The Lord Jesus Christ with ALL your heart, with ALL your soul, with ALL your mind, and with ALL your strength. NO shallow, wishy-washieness. NO Biblical illiteracy. MUST be rooted and grounded IN and UPON The Lord Jesus Christ.
- MUST LOVE ME FOR ME. I am NOT a “project” for you to work on and change. Together we WILL be open and honest, and help each other to grow and BE more like The Lord Jesus Christ. That DOES mean helping each other to change, to grow IN Christ. It does NOT mean to change the very core person that Jesus created and saved. The change(s) that need to be made- make via prayer, love, PATIENCE, communication, openness, honesty, trust, respect, and, oh, PRAYER.
- MUST HONESTLY COMMUNICATE, MUST. No one is a “mind reader”. While I AM good at reading people and determining the general mood they are in- I can NOT read minds. COMMUNICATE. HONEST COMMUNICATION IS VITAL. NOT an option.
- DAILY GROW IN THE LORD JESUS CHRIST, AND IN OUR RELATIONSHIP TOGETHER. We should not be in the same place in our relationship 5 months, a year, 30 years in as we were when we first met. There MUST be a DAILY hunger, thirst, and seeking, a DAILY growing in The Lord.
- PATIENCE AND HUMILITY, are MUSTS. We ARE Christians (wont even date a non-Christian), BUT we ARE still humans and make mistakes, fall, sin. BE PATIENT. BE HUMBLE. This takes DAILY drawing upon GOD’S mercy, grace, peace, strength, and love.
It ALL begins with, centers on, is focused on, and ends with JESUS.
Yes, I DO want the passion, the affection, the intimacy…BUT ONLY as God prescribes, and ONLY in a LIFE built on and in The Lord Jesus Christ.
Lastly, I’ve finally learned, and am learning, to wait on GOD. Pursue The Lord. Trust Jesus explicitly and implicitly…in and for everything. Rather than worry, fret, and stew over “Where is Miss Right?”…BECOME Mr. Right and let GOD do what ONLY GOD can do.
-Rev. Larry Wallenmeyer.